Sunday, 31 July 2011

Eloquence does elude me

For fucks sake! Let me fill you in on a few of the finer details of the parting off me and Mr Good-Company. He ended it via Facebook chat and refused to answer the phone when I tried calling him. I still had a dvd of his and we agreed that I'd just put it in his mailbox. The end, but still be Facebook friends and such.

But that doesn't feel right. Too me, that isn't how you say goodbye to the person you had your first kiss with and lost your virginity too. Call me a soppy, sentimental fuck-wit if you like, but I feel the need for closure. I just want to say goodbye in person. But he won't let me.

 In all seriousness I really would not be at all dramatic. I honestly feel no romantic link to Mr Good-Company at all now, there is just the important fact that he was the one I lost my virginity too. I only want to say goodbye properly.

I don't know if it is only because of my inexperience that I want this. I will never see him again once he moves away in a months time so I really don't know what he's worried about. Goodbyes are just something that's important too me. I've moved around a lot and farewelled a lot of people, often forever.As for those I haven't said goodbye too, I do regret it. I so far regret nothing about my friendship with Mr Good-Company, but I know I will always regret not being able to say goodbye.

*If anyone reading this happens to agree with me on this, I would love it if you could comment. Mr Good-Company does have access to this blog and I would love it if all you wonderful readers could back me up on what a dick he's being about this. Thanks in advance!


  1. i feel it isn't right to not let one or the other person closer. however they wish to go about it. to me it is rare to find a man who is actually a man, and your "friend" mr good company isn't a man at all, and i'd laugh if he thought him self a dom. all he does is take and not take care of. you are by far better without him. ^_^ he may be the first man to take your virginity but he will certainly won't be the best you've ever had, not by far.

  2. He should let you say goodbye. :)

    I do think you need to stop and think for a second... maybe the reason he doesn't want to see you is not because of how you will react, but because of how HE will react or feel afterwards. Maybe he's made the break how he has because he doesn't really want to leave you, and if he see's you he'll regret leaving...

  3. so I linked over from FL and read this, now for my comment... I don't understand why you need closure, he said his good bye and won't answer the phone. I think that if you feel like you have something to say to him your best net is to send him a message,on Facebook. Tell him what ever it is you feel like you have to say. I think giving him back his things a short message (if you must) and be done. If you feel like it get everything out via Facebook and at the end of the message tell him you wouldn't't mind meeting up for lunch sometime. Don't ask him to do lunch just put the ball in his court. you can't demand he meets you, say what you have to say and be done. just my opinion, I just don't see what the big deal is. tell him you are glad you guys can still be friends, make,it seem like you are letting him down. Don't get all sappy, and FYI he doesn't respond to the lunch thing st least you said your peace.


    dawn :0)

  4. I'm a dude. Can tell you some guys don't have need for "good bye"... it's not like he is going to die tomorrow is it? Keep in touch with him and maybe one day years from now you can meet up for coffee or a fuck... I wished I had kept in touch with my first gf... and later in years sometimes fantasied about fucking her one more time... we both lost virginity to each other.

  5. Do you have still have the DVD? Maybe trying writing out the things you still need to say to him, tape it to the DVD box, and slip it in his mailbox, like you were going to anyway. If he reads it, great; if he doesn't, it sucks, but...either way, you got what you needed to say out there, which will maybe help you feel like you got your closure. Just an idea.


  6. Also followed the trail from FL...

    I suck at saying good-bye in person, so I'm actually in your friend's court on this one. Say what you need to say on FB or in a note taped to the DVD as was suugested above, and let it be.

    FWIW, I am still good friends with the one who took my virginity, despite a failed marriage between us. We recently saw each other at a party and gave big sloppy hugs... it can still be good down the road...

  7. The fact that you want to meet in person to say goodbye tells me that you want to witness his reaction. If you have no emotional attachment to him anymore, then there should be no need for this. Just send him a letter and let it go.

  8. Write him a letter to say what you have to say. Then leave it be.