Reaching the Limits

At 6.35am on Saturday morning my train pulled away from the station. I was on my way to Sexpo. Four hours later the bus I had switched to pulled into the station and I waited for Mr Good-Company to arrive. When he did arrived we walked through the rain to Minataur and then onto his car to dump my bag. Next: Sexpo!

By the time we made it to the exhibition centre I had relaxed a bit and wasn't quite as nervous as I had been at first. Though as soon as we entered the event I went a little bit shy again. I had never seen so many toys or half naked people in my life!

After we had walked around for a bit I began to consider buying some things. We tried out a few of the sideshows and I bough my little brother some penis shaped soap as a present. I will fill you in on what I bought in my next post.

As we were finishing lunch we heard a crowd gathering in front of the grandstand. The Bombshell Babes were beginning their show. I had never seen anything like it! To be honest, I really don't know how to describe it. There was stripping, pole climbing, sparks and a lot more than I was expecting to see! Following this we went to another, more sedate strip show. Much less energetic, the girls slowly danced around on stage, removing only their bras. I was mesmorised. I also saw a peep show. This was exactly what I was expecting appart from one thing, I do believe the woman gave me a wave!


After we had seen the strip shows I gave Mr Good-Company a small remote. I was waering a vibrator and he was now in charge of the controls. It was really fun experiment. For a while there I cracked up laughing every time he turned it on. It tickled!

By about 3pm we had seen all there was to see and I was running out of money. We headed back to the hotel. The first thing we did was empty all our purchases onto the bed and see exactly what we had to deal with. I put mine on charge and we watched tv for a bit. Mr Good-Company soon turned off the tvc and turned to me.

'Want to have some fun?'

'What do you think?'

Mr Good-Company moved over to my side of the bed and put his mouth on mine. This was the first kiss I'd had in over 4 months. It was awesome.

He began to suck my nipples and I soon felt his hand moving up under my dress. Needless to say, we soon lost all of our clothing.

'Suck my cock.'

So I eagerly bent over him, eagerly taking him into my mouth. I could feel his pubic hair on my chin. Feel the soft skin of his shaft in my mouth and taste the slight tanginess of pre-cum. It was delicious. After sucking him for a while I moved onto his balls, stroking him with my hand as I did so, before I moved back to his mouth.

He soon sat up and bent over me. Putting his mouth to my pussy, Mr Good-Company began to eat me. I was loving it. To me, nothing quite feels as gentle or as probing as a tongue flicking over my clit, separating my lips and moving inside me. It's a very unique feeling and by god it felt amazing.

Mr Good-Company moved up my body and once again made his way to my breasts. As he sucked and bit my nipples I let out the occasional gasp. He then moved up to my mouth, kissed me hard and reached over for the condoms and the toys he had bought; a cock extender/sleeve thing and a vibrating cock ring.

I sat there, rocking on my heels a little as he put these on. I was more than ready for him by that stage. I wanted him inside me and I wanted him there right away.

Mr Good-Company lay back on the bed and I climbed on top of him. I moaned as he slid himself inside me,

'Is this what you wanted?'

All I could do in reply was nod my head and bite my lip. The could hardly tell that he was wearing the cock extender, I could feel that there was something different there and could also notice the vibrations of the cock ring. But for me, all the stimulation was occuring inside. 

I began to moan as I rode him. Feeling my orgasm building inside I knew it was going to be a pretty good one. It had been so long since I'd had sex. A few moments after I came, Mr Good-Company did. I collapsed on top of him, completely out of breath.

After restocking our brains with much needed oxygen we put our clothes back on and went in hunt of food. We ended up at a little Japanese restaurant not to far from the hotel. Very much being an ignorant country bumpkin I had no idea what to order, not even knowing what the majority of the menu actually consisted of. Mr Good-Company picked out a drink for me and I let the hostess suggest an entree. Well, it turns out I'm not the biggest fan of home made cheese tofu, but the main was delicious. I have never had had vegetables deep fried in my life, now I have. The prawns were also amazing and I even tried sake. Mr Good-Company said that the sake was quite potent though I actually found it easier to drink than the beer he had ordered for me. 

When we finished the meal we braved the pouring rain and headed back to the hotel. We watched the end of a movie before Mr Good-Company stripped down and turned out the lights. I couldn't see him at all and I could only feel him as he moved on top of me. 

He kissed my mouth and nipples before once again heading south. He began to lick me and then I felt him begin to adjust position. He lifted me so that my ass was in the air, legs over his shoulders and my back against his chest and he once again continued with his efforts. I lay my arms out on the bed for balance and very nearly felt myself coming before he lay me back down and reached for the rope.

Following a simple set of instructions packaged with the rope, Mr Good-Company proceeded to tie me up. Due to my height and the curvaseousness of my body, the piece of rope wasn't quite long enough. Mr Good-Company then improvised, tieing more rope to the end of the first piece and my hands behind my back.

Pushing me down onto the bed Mr Good-Company than proceeded to play with and use me. He kissed me hard, pulling on the rope between my legs. I gasped as the rope rubbed against my clit. Moving into the 69 position Mr-Good-Company proceeded to fuck my mouth. Pulling on the rope, he inserted my new vibrator between my legs. I began to moan as he increased the vibrations, licking his cock as I did so.

Mr Good-Company then stood up, pulling me to the edge of the bed he positioned himself between my legs and tried to enter me anally. I felt as relaxed as I could possibly be. I was ready for this, but it just wasn't working. We cchanged positions. With doggy style he was able to enter me, but it hurt. A lot and not in a good way. Once again we changed positions. Reverse cowgirl this time. Once again he couldn't enter me. It seemed that anal just wasn't going to happen.

I was actually quite dissapointed with this. As much as anal so far isn't my favourite thing to do, I do still somehow enjoy it. I'm not sure why, as it certainly has no pleasure as yet but I know I'll make it there one day.

After cleaning himself up, Mr Good-Company knelt between my legs and slid himself into my pussy. With my legs over his shoulders, Mr Good-Company proceeded to pound into me and soon we both found ourselves coming,

Now I know that this will sound silly, but the part of the weekend I was most nervous about was the actual sleeping part. As several friends had assured me, I really did have nothing to worry about. After round two, both semi-clothed, we lay down to sleep on top of the covers. 

Judging by the sound of his snores, Mr Good-Company fell asleep before I did but I was out soon after. I was briefly woken to a mostly still asleep state by the sound of Mr Good-Company positioning the blankets over him, though i was consious of this for only the briefest of moments before nodding off again. Some time later, I woke again and crawled under the blankets myself.

I believe I woke again at 6.30am. Though we had fallen asleep on seperate sides of the bed, I woke with my head on his shoulder and my arm flung across Mr Good-Company's chest. I found it he strangest thing to wake and see someones sleeping face so close to mine. 

This was the first time I had ever shared a bed with someone. I was actually kind of surprised at how nice it was to wake up and feel a warm body beside mine that wasn't a cat. 

I dozed for a while longer before realising that I really needed to use the bathroom. Afterwards, as I hopped back into bed, Mr Good-Company stirred and looked fussily at me.

'Morning.' He said before pulling the blankets up over his shoulders.

'Hello.' 

As Mr Good-Company lay there I moved my hand and began to stroke the shape of his cock through his shorts. After a few moments I felt his hand move and begin to rub against my pants in return. As we continued this our breathing became heavier and we moved our faces close together before kissing gently.

I once again climbed on top of Mr Good-Company, kissing him as we our genitals continued to rub each other through clothing. 

Mr Good-Comapany soon slid of his shorts and I continued to grind my still clad self against his cock. As I did so Mr Good-Company began to rub my breasts through my shirt before he removed it completly. Whilst he began to suck and bite me I half climbed off him and removed my own pants. I climbed back on and began to rub my clit against his cock. Loving the feel of it.

Within a few moments Mr Good-Company stopped me, pausing to put on a condom. I soon began to ride him again. Properly this time.

'Much better than a sleeve.'

'You like my cock do you?'

'Yep.'

I leant down to kiss him and Mr Good-Company wrapped his arms around me, holding me tight against him as he kissed me hard, thrusting into me as he did so.

I could feel myself beginning to come once again. I sat up, moving faster against him. Biting my lip I continued to ride him until I came.

Once I had regained my breath I began to move once again but Mr Good-Company stopped me, rolling me onto my back. With my legs once again over his shoulders he fucked me hard. Causing me to orgasm once again. 

As Mr Good-Company came, he collapsed on my chest. I held him there for a bit before it was time to shower and leave.

Outside the hotel I said goodbye to Mr Good-Comapny and caught a taxi to the station. That was the end of my weekend.

Lost in the City

I'm not entirely sure what to write. I know only that my fingers have chosen to lead me here so there must be something that I want to say, so just bare with me...

Sexpo is still on thankfully. I don't know what I'd do if it wasn't. Since Mr Good-Company hasn't been replying to my texts, I spent the morning worrying that he had decided to back out. Due to my anxiety condition this means that I made myself near physically ill. I actually had to miss the ab class at the gym which I am rather disapointed about. I like that class. Apparently hidden beneath the flab I have some pretty decent abs.

Instead, I did a quick gym session before the nausea became to much, then I went home, took some anxiety meds and tried to force myself to relax. I think it worked to some extent.

Later on I received a Facebook message from Mr Good-Company saying that our plans would have to change slightly. That he couldn't hang out with me for the few hours between checking out of the hotel and catching the train back home. I will admit I'm actually quite disappointed about this. I had hoped to spend more time with Mr Good-Company. But I suppose that what I have will just have to suffice.

I am now left trying to decide what to do instead. Do I find a cafe and wait away the few hours until my train arrives? Or do I catch a later train home and have a look around Melbourne for the day? I have never been in the city by myself so both prospects are rather scary. Had I know earlier that this was going to happen I would have been able to hang out with Anita for the day. But unfortunately, this close to the weekend, she has already made plans to visit her brothers in Sale so will be out of town. I really don't know what I should do.

Today is Thursday. Sexpo is on Saturday. That means I have one more day to figure out what I'm going to do. Any suggestions?

Bigger than Butterflies

Today is Wednesday. On Saturday I go to Melbourne, to Sexpo. To put it simply I am extremely nervous.

I spent today shopping for clothes to wear, apparently it's going to be quite warm and I have no Summer clothes. I asked Mr Good-Company what I should wear. I received the response 'corset and fishnets'. Yeah that's not going to happen.

As a rather happy coincidence, Sexpo is set to coincide with my horniest time of the month. I am already in the midst of this time and I believe it's effects are being further heightened by by my anticipation of 'after Sexpo'. I'm horny as hell and it's driving me absolutely nuts!

Clothes shopping, and thinking of how those clothes will be removed was enough to cause things to become rather, umm... 'damp'. Even after that play session I can still feel myself aching to be filled. I want sex. I want to feel a mouth on mine, a tongue up and down my pussy and teeth on my nipples. I want my mouth filled with cock. To feel the different textures, the warmth of cum in my mouth.

I can't wait for this weekend...

Being a Wart

No, not that sort you filthy minded folks! I am a worry wart. I stress over the littlest things. I simply can't help it. Let me explain...

I have an anxiety disorder. I don't suffer from panic attacks, I simply 'stress'. I worry, and I worry, and I worry. The more stressed I become, the more things I find to worry about.

Right now there area couple of things causing me stress. Money is a constant stressor, though over the last couple of months I have finally managed to gather myself together and start saving. Sexpo was my main motivator, but also the fact that I miss my best friend Anita. Like Mr Good-Company she lives in Melbourne, which means I don't see her very often. So to visit her, I need to save some dough.

My other main stressor at the moment is work. Not the lack of it, but that I am working a lot. It's this amount of work that is enabling to save some money. I do really, really enjoy my job, but even I become tired. I recently worked 12 days in a row and then had just one day off. Straight after I moved into another 13 day stretch. This isn't rostered on to happen, but as I mentioned, I enjoy my job and need the extra money. This means I am the first to put my hand up for any extra shifts. But by the end of it (I have currently just finished day 11 of 13) I do become a little bit grumpy.

I admit that I am a little bit grumpy now. I am tired and am tomorrow I am booked in for an appointment with my nutritionist that I know is not going to go well. Right now I am stressing about Sexpo. I can't help it. I know I have nothing to be worried about. But still I worry. I am worried about being in the city. I am nervous about being around large crowds of people. I am nervous about seeing Mr Good-Company again. I am nervous about staying the night with him. I am nervous about trying anal again and on top of all those things I'm worried that the hotel may not have received out booking!

To further annoy me, Mr Good-Company keeps disappearing from chats. I'm not as angry as I once would have been. To be honest I'm just excited that Sexpo is happening. But at the same time I want to talk about it. I want to ask questions, I want to know what I've signed up for. But over all I'm just excited and can't help rambling on!

I apologise for the fact that this post has had no real plot. Due to being stressed there were just a few things I needed to say. I am tired, grumpy and nervous, annoyed and bouncing of the walls with excitement. This time next week I will be back home after spending the night in Melbourne. I hope that I will be bruised, tired and happy.

Thanks for listening to my ramblings folks, I appreciate it.

Check In

'A studio apartment with kitchenette, ensuite,CBD location and wireless internet access'

That is where Mr Good-Company and I will be staying on the 26th of November. It is confirmed and booked folks, I am going to Sexpo!

I have spent the last 6 weeks wondering whether or not this would actually happen. First due to Mr Good-Company having made similar such statements before; 'I'll take you to the sex shop' and second because of Mr Good-Company saying he may not be single by the time the event rolled around. But after all that waiting, the disappointment at his near cancellation, things have actually come together. I have time of work, the hotel is booked and paid for and now all I need to do is buy myself a train ticket.

To say I am excited would be a rather massive understatement. Imagine a room full of Twilight fans meeting Rob Pattinson or Taylor Lautner. Imagine the squeals of excitement, the bouncing up and down: this is me. I can't stop grinning and if I wanted to look like a total twat I assure you that I would be bouncing up and down whilst squealing as well. I think I'm just going to stick with the silly grin.

I'm writing this at 11pm on a Friday night. At this time next week I will be lying in bed, grinning my silly face off. I'll need to sleep, the next morning I'll be catching a 6.30am train into the city. But I know I'll just continue to lie there in bed, twisting from one side to the other, trying to find a comfortable spot in my usually perfect. I wont fall asleep until after midnight, and I know I'll be grinning all the while.

I can't wait! Grins

The Painted Girl

I guess you never really know what will happen on any given day. You think you know, but thats all you can really hope for. I knew that today I would wake up, have some breakfast and go to the gym. I'd the come back home, make some Jam Drops and bum around the place for the rest of the day. Apparently, I didn't know any of this.

It is very nearly the summer holidays here in Australia. As such, my younger sister is home from uni for several months. She's managed to find herself some work at one of the aged care facilities near where I live, so I seem to have gained myself a flatmate for the summer. It's both better and worse than expected. We don't want to kill each other yet, but it's become very apparent to me how used to living alone I am. I never want to have to share a bathroom again! The shower war, is on.

Today I had the day off so we decided to do a few jobs up the street, scouring the local vintage shops as we went. Around lunchtime my sister headed back to my parents place which is closer to her other job and I met up with my younger brother instead.

It was a lovely sunny day so I decided that after we had found him some clothes to wear to his year 12 graduation we would go and eat some salad sandwiches at the beach. As I parked the car the clouds began to desend. As we ate our lunch it began to drizzle. But that's okay, I happen to quite like rain. We headed down to the beach, removing our shoes as we went and headed straight into the water. It was freezing but wonderful.

We had walked back and fourth, knee deep amongst the waves for maybe five minutes before the rain came down. But this was still okay. That is until the wind picked up and started to blow sand at us. It was rather ferosious actually. I could feel it stinging our legs as we turned our backs to it. Children were fast evacuating the water as there parents herded tham back to cars. My brother and I followed suit though still becoming drenched in the process.

With several hours before we had to go and pick up his car from the dealer, we decided to head back up the main street. Until someone remembered that we had once decided to go to the sex shop when a certain little brother turned 18. Just by pure chance, I had figured out exactly where the shop was a week earlier, so we knew where we were going at least.

The town I live in is a bit more than slightly conservative, so the the only place a sex shop was allowed to open was out on the industrial estate. My brother and I parked out front and headed in. As we walked in the owner informed us that he was closing early and we would only have 5 minutes to brow,se.

I wasn't able to have as good a look at everything as I would have liked, but it really wasn't as exciting as I had hoped. I don't know if this was because I was with my brother or if it was only due to the fact that it was a sex store in the country. I intend to go back another time and find out.

My other story for the day involved running into my friend G-String. I ran into him after the sex shop and he hung about with me and my brother for awhile before my brother wandered off elsewhere. G-String told me that he had been hanging out with some friend s of his who were trying to raise awareness about a community art project, but he had left because he just felt a little bit awkward.

Why was it awkward? Well the girl trying to raise awareness for this project was wearing a g-string and nipple pasties, whilst 'clothed' in full body paint with a design of puzzle pieces painted all over her. Knowing the woman who did the painting, it sure must have been a changed to the normal kids face painting that she does.

This girl looked amazing. She was on the chubby side of skinny, but I don't think you would be able to call her chubby or skinny. She simply looked normal. My first thought was how the hell are the police not here? My second thought was that I now knew whet my former drawing teacher was on about in the facebook status he had posted about using boobs as a promotional tool.

G-String and I went for coffee before meeting up with my brother again. As my brother and I were about to part ways with G-String we ran into The Painted Girl again. Now the police were involved. We hung around for a bit jsut to see how things would go, but it all seemed to end well. When the police left The Painted Girl told us that someone had dobbed her in for indecent exposure.  Since the art group had permission (from who, I don't know) there was no issue. Though I do think she was told to put some clothes on if she wanted to avoid taking the issue further.

So that wad my day in which I knew all that was going to happen. How wrong I was. I have no doubt I'll be reading something about The Painted Girl in the newspapers tomorrow. There will be people applauding her courage and others denouncing her for her public nudity. In my opinion she is a very brave woman for having done what she did. Though unlike me with my knowing what would happen today, I'm sure that she knew the police would make an appearance at some point. Painted Girl, I take my hat off to you. Well done.

Not Even a Bakers Dozen

Well, I didn't make it past day 12. I'm talking about my self-celibacy of course. I tried my best, I really did. However, these things often don't go to plan.

The hurdle in my attempt came in the form of Ass Face himself, more often known as Mr Good-Company. Now if you are a regular reader you will know just how much I have been looking forward to going to Sexpo with him. Now it wasn't just Sexpo itself I was looking forward to, but the night of fun to follow. It has been approximately 3.5 months since I have had sex and 2.5 months since I have had any fun at all, even something as simple as kissing. I was reeeally looking forward to 'After Sexpo'.

Then out of the blue, a massive projectile fell out of the sky and knocked my celibate, fantasising little socks off. Mr Good-Company was talking to a girl and he really thinks/thought (don't ask me, I don't know) that he has a chance with her. As such he would be 'un-single' come Sexpo time.

I'm not going to lie, I did cry. I was quite upset. Despite my attempts not to raise my own hopes, not to expect it to happen until it actually did, I had begun to really believe it would happen.

At this stage, Mr Good-Company has said that if nothing happens with this girl, then Sexpo is still on. But I'm not letting my hopes be raised again, I don't like how much it hurts when I fall through the sky and crash back down to reality. In my mind, until he let's me know otherwise, Sexpo is 99.99% not happening (I want to say it's not happening, but damn it I still seem to be hoping).

Now I am aware, as several close friends have told me, that I am being silly, stupid, naive, insert appropriate insult here. I know this. I really, really do. I know I am nothing but a fall back option for sex, for a blow job, for a good time. If I let myself think about, it does hurt. But I choose not to. I want sex to, I want oral, I want to have a good time. Unfortunately, this seems to be the only way I can have this good time.

Okay! Calm down! I'm not having a go at myself so to speak, I know one day there will be others One day someone will want me for more than just sex. I've never given up hope of that. The day I give up hope, will be the day that living loses it's appeal. I am an optimist. I always have been. Even when I considered suicide several years ago, the one thought that stopped me was that 'One day it will be better'. I still believe this. One day it will be better.

Still wondering how my celibacy failed? It's simple really, when I'm quite upset I play. It makes me feel better. I do think that I failed my celibacy attempt, but that doesn't matter to me. I tried my best. I survived longer than I thought, proved that I am stronger than I thought. But that is what often seems to be the case, you never really know exactly how strong you can be, until you are tested. I am always being tested. I am always stronger than expected and I always will be.